Girl holding a flower in front of her face

Gratitude Saved Me From Anger

What comes to mind when I ponder over what has helped me reach such a stable place after only 7 months since the accident? Cultivating gratitude. It allows me to foster positivity instead of drowning myself in the pain and trauma. I grew up with incredible parents who, from the beginning, taught me to focus on the positive. That is actually the original tagline for their line of Natural Emotional Care® products. Lucky me to have grown up having gratitude and positivity instilled into my very being! It was not apparent to me until recently just how much this positive outlook saved me from becoming bitter and angry.

It was not until now, reflecting back on these past several months, that I realized how big an impact growing up in this way had on me as a person. For example, below is a post I made on Facebook just two weeks after the accident.

"I have a lot of reasons to be angry. I watched my dad and cousin (more like sister) die. I shattered my femur and sliced my heel in half so now almost 100% of my time is spent on a couch, and it's predicted to be that way for 2-3 months. I wasn't able to finish my internship, so I don't know if I'll be able to graduate in August anymore. I wasn't able to enjoy my last month living in Boone with my best friend. I wasn't able to be sad about the best four years of my life being over. I could be sad...but I have more important things to grieve over. So although I should be angry...I'm not.

I'm alive. I may not be able to walk right now, but I'll be able to again. I lost two of the most important people in my life, but the amount of love and support I've received from my family and friends, and people I've never even met, has shown me how much love is out there. I have a greater capacity to love through all of my grief. My emotions have become richer...I feel things like I've never felt before. I have a new appreciation for life and people. Little things that bothered me before aren't bothering me the same, because life really is too damn short to get pissed about trivial things. And although I miss my dad and Jenna like I have never missed anyone, I am creating a closeness with my mom and brother that I never would have been able to create without this type of loss.

I don't really know why I wanted to share that...maybe just to say life is all about perspective."

I wanted to share this again to emphasize that there is always something good to focus on. Our attitudes will make or break us. I did not let the anger I could have rightfully felt consume me. I chose and continue to choose to let my pain make me better.

On top of that, in the words of Stephen Colbert, I am learning to "love the thing that I most wish had not happened." I've said it before, and I'll say it again: life is a gift, in all of its magnificence and suffering. I am not picking and choosing the life experiences in which to be grateful to God for, because all of life is a gift. I am choosing to love every moment of my life, even the moments that bring me inexhaustible pain.

I highly, HIGHLY encourage you to begin practicing gratitude. It will truly transform your life.

If you enjoyed this post, you should check out my post about mindfulness Thank you for reading!






Comments

Kaylie Schmidt

Amber, YOU are one special human! So grateful to have you in my life!!

Kaylie Schmidt

Kay! “life is a gift, in all of its magnificence and suffering. I am not picking and choosing the life experiences in which to be grateful to God for, because all of life is a gift. I am choosing to love every moment of my life, even the moments that bring me inexhaustible pain.” This is beautifully true. I’m currently reading “Notes To Myself: My Thoughts On Becoming A Person” by Hugh Prather. One of his entries spoke very deeply to me.. “But it’s morning. Within my hands is another day. Another day to listen and love and walk and glory. I am here for another day. I think of those who aren’t.” Through all the things that go on in my head, I keep in the back of my mind that I’m lucky to be able to feel things, that I’m lucky to be able to have another day with my feet on this Earth, that it’s not a bad life it’s just a bad day. You’re one special human! XO

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